You better not hack
You'd better not cheat
You'd better not even try to speak L33T
'Cause Santa Claus is coming online

He'll trace your IP
You better be warned
He knows you're downloading tentacle porn
Yes Santa Claus is coming online

He monitors the channels
He's there on IRC
He knows that Alice22
is really Brian, 43

For spammers and such
He's watching your back
This Christmas you'll get a D-DOS attack
'Cause Santa Claus is coming online

For companies too
I'm glad to report
He doesn't like outsourced tech support
And Santa Claus is coming online

He cracks down 419ers
And the spyware that he hates
He's got a radioactive lump of coal
To deliver to Bill Gates

He's found your back door
He's gonna get root
He'll fiddle with your settings and make you reboot
Yes Santa Claus is coming online

He's reading your mail
He's scanning your ports
He's knows that your cracked OS wasn't bought
Yes Santa Claus is coming online

He'll bypass all your safeguards
And passwords by brute force
He'll uninstall your programs
And replace them with open source

So virus checks on
Your firewall too
Santas online and he's coming for you
Oh, Santa Claus is coming online

So virus checks on
Your firewall too
Santa's on the prowl and he knows Kung Fu
Yes Santa Claus is coming online!!!

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